GCSE Letter: Model Answer (Edexcel GCSE English Language)

Genre (format)

Audience

Purpose

A letter

A headteacher or principal

To inform, argue and/or persuade

Introduction:

What I am writing about and why I am writing

• In response to request for letters — theme of exploring our planet

• Give my opinion

Paragraph 1:

My views on exploration

• Humans are curious — natural to explore

• What we can discover from exploration — use a triplet

• What has been accomplished — examples — climbing Mount Everest

• Inspirational — emotive language

Paragraph 2:

What harm we may be causing

• Cheap air travel — pollution

• Impact of humans on natural spaces

• Personal experience

Paragraph 3:

What should be done to ensure exploration is safe

• Increased awareness of impact — Sir David Attenborough quote

• Idea of “giving back” — making things carbon neutral

Conclusion:

Summing up and final argument

• Sum up the positives and the negatives

• Make a case for future generations and the use of technology

5th December 2024

Dear Ms Smith,

I am writing in response to your request for letters on the theme of exploring our planet in an eco-conscious way. I would agree that everyone should be encouraged to explore all the wonders our planet has to offer, but within reason. [Marking comment]

As a species, we are naturally curious and many of us have a desire to explore. [Marking comment] Even as young children, we learn about our immediate environment by exploring and testing boundaries; it is therefore natural that we would want to expand this exploration to find out about our wider world. [Marking comment] Those who push the boundaries of exploration are often the ones who discover new information about species, people or ways of living. From the millions of species of animals, plants and insects living in the Amazon rainforest, for example, we can discover new medicines and potentially cures for diseases which could benefit all of humankind. [Marking comment] The desire to explore has resulted in some amazing human feats, such as climbing Mount Everest or exploring the deepest depths of the world’s oceans. [Marking comment] Records have been broken and new benchmarks have been set; these amazing pioneers encourage and inspire the next generation of explorers to push their limits and uncover every corner of the planet.

However, exploration of any kind can come with risks, and the potential to do harm. Overseas travel has become more affordable and easy, but the abundance of cheap air tickets has led to hundreds, if not thousands, of flights per day all across our skies. This results in pouring more pollutants into our already choked atmosphere. [Marking comment] The impact of increased human activity on natural spaces can lead to loss of habitat and ecological issues such as flooding. We leave our mark through litter and plastic pollution. Furthermore, the rise of adventure tourism in recent years means that we can disturb the delicate balance of nature in remote and rarely visited areas. [Marking comment] These trips can also be expensive — even though travel has become more affordable, it is still aspirational for many. In my class alone, there are several of my classmates who have never even been on a plane, but who have to sit and listen to those who are fortunate enough to go on holiday once or even twice a year brag about it and what a good time they have had.[Marking comment] This can cause division and bad feeling within a class, and make those who are not lucky enough to have this privilege feel as though they are missing out.

Therefore, there is a balance to be had. Now, more than ever, we are aware of the damage we can and are inflicting on our planet. Thanks to advocates such as Sir David Attenborough, who reminds us that “in just 30 years, by 2050, over 300 species will become extinct due to human activity and pollution”, we are much more aware of the impact we have. [Marking comment] We must therefore balance the benefits of exploration and our human need to explore with the need to maintain the delicate balance of life on this planet. If exploration is important to you, then choose carbon-neutral projects, or organisations who are eco-conscious and who offset their impact in a positive way. Or what about the idea of “giving back” as part of a trip? [Marking comment] There are lots of companies who offer the opportunity to volunteer on environmental projects while abroad.

Ultimately, we should be putting the needs of our planet first, in order to protect it for future generations. In fact, advances in technology mean that we can explore vast realms and continents without ever setting foot outside of a classroom. If we, as humans, have the ability to explore, then we also have a duty to ensure our curiosity does not destroy the very thing we are most curious about. [Marking comment]

Yours sincerely,

• The response is deliberately crafted to create specific effects and to elicit a response from the reader, with sophisticated use of tone, style and register

• It has consciously used a range of structural and grammatical features to support coherence and cohesion

• Extensive vocabulary has been used strategically, with only rare spelling errors (if any) which do not detract from the overall meaning

• The writing has been punctuated deliberately and with accuracy

• A range of sentence structures is used accurately and selectively to achieve particular effects